Ookamikakushi – 12 (END)
This is the scariest episode in the series.
Don’t believe me? I can feel your skepticism — the story ended in the previous episode, after all, and the show itself had not been particularly scary that creeper brother of Isuzu’s bit the big one. Anyway, there is a point in this episode where Isuzu and Kaname meet up with Hiro in a cafe. Both Isuzu and Kaname are dressed as maids. Now this may all seem nice and innocent, but a few moments prior to this Hiro was nearly molested for the umpteenth time by a horny wolf lured by his scent — that is, until he whipped out his hassaku mace, and all was right with the world — thus establishing a dark tone to this part of the story.
And then it happens. Isuzu gets a gleam in her eye — the type of gleam where everyone knows nothing good will come from it. There’s something terrifying waiting in the shadows, lurking, hoping for the worst possible place to step in, when finally . . .
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GET IT AWAY OH MY GOD THE PAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNN
Seriously, though, aside from Hiro looking like a weathered hooker about 20 years past her prime, this is not meant to be a scary episode. Instead, it is a bizarrely over-the-top goofball episode that has very little to do with the previous episodes in story and in tone. In a way, it is entertaining, if only for the insanity of it all, but at the same time it is of course complete bullshit. None of the gaping questions and plot holes are addressed in any significant way, which would infuriate me much more if I actually had anything invested in this series anymore. Thankfully, this is not the case!
(This is Isuzu finally catching up with the viewers about 11 episodes too late.)
This episode, I suppose, really pushes the normality that the characters are trying to achieve after their numerous run-ins with rape wolves and unhinged men who promise revenge but never quite get around to making a decent plan. Any by “normality”, I mean “sitting around and bullshitting all day”. Some things never change, however. Even when there is no threat to his life, Hiro ends up looking like an enormous wimp when the girls gang up on him at various points. He does have the right idea, though — for once — when he uses Isuzu as an excuse to get away from Nemuru at the end of the first segment when she is about to launch into a 10-hour speech about her favorite cartoon rabbit.
That shit would have been boring as hell. I commend you for running away so that we would not have to get an earful, Hiro.
(Except the whole second part of the episode is about Nemuru bullshitting around with her rabbit costume — and putting together some sort of Rabbit Hell for Mana, I don’t know, it’s fucking bizarre — SO NEVER MIND.)
This is the opposite of how I reacted upon learning that ep12 is all bullshit and doesn’t bother to answer anything. “Huh. Really? Well, I’m surprised.”
The third part of this episode is by far the funniest because it is 1) Insane and 2) chock full of unintentional humor. It never occurred to me, for instance, that anyone would turn iced coffee into a metaphor for sex, but by golly, Ookamikakushi went the extra mile for the viewer for one episode! The waitress who wanted Hiro to get a load of her goodies keeps mumbling about iced coffee the whole time; if it is some sort of sexual thing, I’m not sure I want to know to what it refers. Did she name her breasts after iced coffee? Does she squirt out iced coffee instead of milk? Does she enjoy a post-coital iced coffee? Did she know I would spend four sentences obsessing over such a nonsense reference? Hiro’s anti-rape juice saves the day, so the poor viewers never get an answer to this difficult question. Typical Ookamikakushi, dodging the pertinent questions.
Then a yakuza boss shows up at the cafe and immediately develops a boner for hooker!Hiro. The episode leaves it ambiguous as to whether he is one of the wolves affected by the curse — Hiro certainly seems to believe so, which adds more to his anxiety when the yakuza dude wants to get to first base with Hiro — but I actually prefer the yakuza guy to be a regular dude, because wouldn’t that be the ultimate strikeout? You meet who you believe — for whatever reason — is a cute waitress in a maid outfit, you take her home for some lovin’ and then you discover, to your horror, that this “cute waitress” is actually a dopey, wimpy teenage guy who is huddled in the corner, blushing away. Now there is a night that is completely ruined.
Before the yakuza dude can fulfill his sick destiny, however, Nemuru’s grandfather chases yakuza dude out of the cafe because he’s a world class ninja or something, except he strains a hip while doing so because HE’S FUCKING OLD. Sorry, old dude: There’s no Viagra for the hip. Apparently there is also some subplot about some TV show in Jouga land (because they actually have some sort of programming beyond Jouga hassaku commercials), but who needs those when you have–
HAHAHA YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD GET AWAY, DIDN’T YOU
(Final thoughts on Ookamikakushi: Classic example of slowly pissing away a somewhat interesting premise. Other than that, it’s fine. Although hooker!Hiro brings the overall Fine Factor into the negatives. Hideyoshi he is not.)