Archive for the 12 Moments Category

12 (Nice) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 1 – With a Little Help from My Friends

Posted in 12 Moments, Meta Sucks and Yet I Am Doing This, Shameless Whoring with tags on 12/25/2011 by Shinmaru

Plenty of folks have sucked the SCCSAV’s cock already; I’m just adding one more mouth to the orgy.

It’s a simple but fun and grand idea that has added quite a bit of color to my anime viewing this year. Let’s face it: If all we did was pontificate on our stupid blogs, this community would become quickly sterile. A lot of us (myself included) spew a bunch of bullshit atop our soap boxes, but we need an outlet to really bullshit, you know? I never really liked forums — they feel static to me, and you have to pour so much time into keeping track of dumb conversations, which is increasingly difficult for me. So fuck forums.

Twitter is like the ideal forum for me. It’s quick, real-time and direct. It’s easy to keep track of all your retarded conversations, and it’s easy to jump in and out of convoluted conversation threads. You can immediately spaz out about whatever nonsense you’re watching. Maybe constant media exposure has destroyed my brain, and I can’t function without some shiny tweet gracing my eyes every few seconds, but WHATEVER, MAN.

However, Twitter is, of course, limited, and that’s where the SCCSAV steps in. The beauty of the group is its simplicity. It all boils down to these two sentences:

“HEY, YOU GUYS WANNA WATCH SOME ANIME TOGETHER?”

“FUCK YEAH!”

There are people from all over the world in the group itself, and on Twitter, so it’s almost a guarantee that you’ll find someone who wants to watch something. And then it’s a hop, skip and a jump to Skype (or Teamspeak or whatever), and boom, tough actin’ Tinactin you’re interacting with people in an impromptu anime club showing. It’s simple, spontaneous and flexible, and that’s what makes the proceedings so much fun.

I’ve watched plenty of great and not-so-great anime with my brethren this year, and every meeting has been awesome. No matter how pretentious or intellectual or holier-than-thou any of us acts, at heart we’re all a bunch of goofballs who want to have fun watching silly Japanese cartoons. I can sincerely say that my sessions with the Terribad group, the classic anime group, the shipping group, the Macross group, and on and on and on have affected my life for the better. It’s easy to forget when we are in abundance on the Interwebs, but anime is niche as shit, and I personally know maybe five or six people who watch anime, and certainly none of them with the frequency that I do.

So, yes, I am grateful for all you chucklefucks who join me in watching my ultraviolent porno cartoons every week. To another year!

12 (Naughty) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 1 – Masochism

Posted in 12 Moments, Sister Princess with tags on 12/25/2011 by Shinmaru

Skip to 4:30 in the video to witness the one moment of joy Sister Princess has given me.

Watching Sister Princess (almost) every week has been . . . an experience. Judging from the idiotic premise, lousy production values and mind-numbingly dull writing, I wouldn’t blame you for thinking that I grow angrier as I watch each episode, like an Incredible Hulk who is set off by awful anime. But after 17 episodes of Sister Princess, I would say that watching it brings me no emotion at all — anger, joy, sorrow, and so on, they all leave me during the course of a normal episode of Sister Princess.

It is quite possibly the most lifeless, bloodless piece of media I’ve ever consumed. I can’t bring myself to be angry at all these fetishized dolls throwing themselves at some bland turd of a lead character, because everything is crafted with such banality. At least Shuffle! has the guts to go all out with its idiocy. Sister Princess plays like it was created by a group of people who are afraid of being judged for their stupid fetish that nobody gives a shit about. They want to go all-out incest orgy, but they just can’t, because there’s no conviction — only fear. And so every episode has characters searching for teddy bears or shopping for light bulbs.

So when I watch Sister Princess, it is the truest form of emotional masochism, because I feel nothing inside for those 23 minutes. My eyes see images unfolding onscreen, but nothing registers in my brain. That awful slow-talking loli says something that is supposed to be cute, but it is too faint to reach my heart. Even the immense pain I felt when that evil dojikko cheerleader fuckface spilled some shrill nonsense from her hateful mouth is nothing but a dull throb now. I am but an empty shell of a man for 23 minutes a week.

What I’m trying to say is Sister Princess is turning me into a serial killer.

(More reflections on page two.)

12 (Nice) Moments in Anime 2011 No. 2 – The Trickster Is Tricked

Posted in 12 Moments, Level E with tags on 12/24/2011 by Shinmaru

I’m not sure I would say Level E is the “best” show of 2011, but when it comes to pure enjoyment, it’s probably the one I liked most. Prince Baka made me laugh more than every other character from every other anime combined this year, and the writing is consistently strong and interesting, even when the stories don’t quite work.

And the ending . . . I’m stepping up to the plate and saying Level E‘s finale is the best and most satisfying final episode I watched this year. Just by virtue of being satisfying, it beats like 90 percent of anime endings already, but it’s truly the culmination of everything that makes Level E a wonderful, entertaining series. The writing keeps you guessing, but once the twist comes, it’s so well-executed that you swear you should have seen it coming the whole time. Prince Baka is at his douchebaggiest, fucking with people for the sheer hilarity of it. Kraft is alternately trying to figure out Baka and freaking the fuck out.

And the princess. Oh, that princess.

Princess Luna proves herself Baka’s equal — perhaps even superior — by doing to him what he has done to everyone else throughout the series. For me, it’s the most romantic gesture of the year: Luna sweeps Baka off his feet by beating him at his own game. She sees what she wants, and she gets it, and she has such fun executing her grandiose plot! And the sparks when Baka realizes Luna has pulled the wool over his head~ <3 Only Baka can appreciate the sheer work Luna has done to become as amazing as she is.

That’s a pairing I can get behind. Luna x Baka: Ship of the Year.

12 (Naughty) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 2 – Box Cutter Blues

Posted in 12 Moments, Shuffle! with tags on 12/24/2011 by Shinmaru

*picks up a harmonica and starts playing*

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12 (Nice) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 3 – The Bomb

Posted in 12 Moments, Barefoot Gen with tags on 12/23/2011 by Shinmaru

Barefoot Gen is often compared with Studio Ghibli’s Grave of the Fireflies – both concern themselves with the dire situation in Japan as World War II drove to a close, and both movies view the war through the eyes of children. Barefoot Gen is a comparatively sloppy movie: The animation isn’t particularly strong, and the voice acting for the kids is raw and weak (mainly because actual children are providing the voices). But there’s one moment in Barefoot Gen that will be burned into my memory for life: The moment when the bomb is dropped on Hiroshima.

I’ve watched so many war movies that I am almost numb to the violence. Real violence still shakes me to my core — I think you’d have to be inhuman to not be affected by it in some way. But through the haze of fiction? We see so much violence in our stories (and have for decades; this is not a new development) that it’s difficult to be shocked by it. When the bomb drops in Barefoot Gen, however, the way the nuclear fire rips through the citizens of Hiroshima is so raw and disturbingly detailed that I felt it deep down in my gut.

It’s not something that is played for entertainment; it’s something that exists so that humanity will never forget. However one views the sides and roles of World War II, the bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki — along with the other numerous horrific events and battles of the war — should never disappear from our collective memory. Every day that passes, I hope we can learn from the past and move closer to an era where such brutal conflict is unnecessary.

The cynic in me thinks I’ll die disappointed; the optimist in me thinks movement even by centimeters is a worthy goal.

12 (Naughty) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 3 – ODEEEEEEEEN

Posted in 12 Moments, Odin with tags on 12/23/2011 by Shinmaru

FUCK YEAH, GIANT HAIR

FUCK YEAH, GUITAR SOLOS

FUCK YEAH, CREDITS

FUCK YEAH, LOUDNESS

FUCK YEAH, ODEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

12 (Nice) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 4 – The Greatest Gainax Ending

Posted in 12 Moments, Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt with tags on 12/22/2011 by Shinmaru

I hope we never see another episode of Panty and Stocking, and that this will forever be our final memory of the series.

12 (Naughty) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 4 – The Greatest Ending of All Time

Posted in 12 Moments, Mars of Destruction with tags on 12/22/2011 by Shinmaru

Mars of Destruction is perhaps the Ed Woodiest of any anime production. (Either that or Musashi Gundoh.) Whether that’s a compliment or not depends on who you are, I guess.

It’s a thoroughly incompetent production, but definitely not for lack of trying — it’s a clear case of ambition vastly outstripping talent and/or budget. In fewer than 19 minutes, Mars of Destruction attempts to tell the story of a special alien fighting force doing battle with a group of monsters called Ancients that have begun appearing in Tokyo. After one of the special fighters has her head replaced with a bad Photoshop effect, it is so totally on, and there is much poorly-animated violence done to the tune of haphazardly-selected classical music. This is how you can tell what is happening onscreen is Important and A Big Deal.

But that’s not the best part. No, the actual best part is at the end when a scientist calmly tosses out a plot twist or two relating to an expedition to Mars humanity did that ended in disaster before the beginning of the series. Basically they found some Mars rocks that have traces of DNA that belong to humanity . . . which means that humans originated from Mars!!!!! As if he is aware that this bombshell has been dropped on the viewer, one of the Ancients the special team fights suddenly speaks up and confirms that, yes, humans are the true invaders (de geso), and the Ancients are the actual Earthlings.

Then the special team blows him away. There is much confusion over this shocking revelation. Then the OVA ends. Bye!

Look, I can’t do anything to make Mars of Destruction seem any crazier. It’s truly inexplicable. Just watch it. It’s 20 minutes that will enrich your life as it simultaneously sucks those minutes away.

12 (Nice) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 5 – A Blowaway Concert

Posted in 12 Moments, Macross with tags , on 12/21/2011 by Shinmaru

(Image yoinked from Crusader’s post on Macross Frontier: The Wings of Goodbye over at THAT Anime Blog.)

I had a ton of fun watching this with kadian and Dave when we needed to call an audible one Saturday morning because not enough people showed up to watch School Rumble. It was just kadian and me at first, and once Wings of Goodbye opened with this crazy ass Sheryl concert, I think we both knew we’d be getting something pretty damn fun. (Dave joined in after the concert — I hope the guy went back and watched it later.)

Even as the biased Sheryl fan I am, I wouldn’t say this is the best concert in the movie; the prison concert is clearly the better set piece, both for the way it’s used in the story, and as a spectacular piece of visual entertainment despite all the Macross 7 callbacks that surely made ghostlightning jizz all over his computer screen. But this is the one I think of first because it opens the movie, and because Sheryl is fucking awesome.

Also because the above picture had me dying of HNNNNNNNNGH. So there’s that.

For how much I love good writing and characterization and whatnot, it just feels good to lose myself in some insanely crafted piece of animation that makes my brain want to explode with joy. The love and care put into this sequence is obvious, and it makes me want to be the lapdog for Shoji Kawamori and his army of artists.

12 (Naughty) Moments of Anime 2011 No. 5 – I Want to Join Happy Science

Posted in 12 Moments, Rebirth of Buddha with tags on 12/21/2011 by Shinmaru

The Rebirth of Buddha is the greatest depiction of religion ever.

Just look at the picture above. That is the Buddha. He is standing atop a glowing elephant. Don’t you want to drop everything and worship him immediately?

The Buddha has psychic powers, commands an army of angels, has tremendous mass media influence, and again, he’s got his own elephant. Also, man is he ever white. He’s so fucking white that he’s glowing. There’s nobody more trustworthy than a glowing white dude in a white suit.

Furthermore, the Buddha’s hair in this movie is actually brown, which means that, yes, the Buddha can go Super Saiyan. Is there anything he cannot do?

You can worship all this and more by joining Happy Science. If you believe that North Korea and China are planning to colonize Japan after a thorough nuclear razing, or if you want a leader who can channel the spirits of Muhammad, Jesus Christ, Buddha and Confucius, then by Buddha, this is the religion for you.

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