Star Driver 3 – The Hammer Is My Penis

Or the sword in this case.

This episode is kind of funny but also kind of boring since it’s doing the whole Utena “Hey, guys, let’s use the same episode structure in each arc!” thing, but it doesn’t have quite the same sizzle yet. Mrs. Watanabe tries to make up for that all by herself, though. I laughed at everyone being so eager to clean her damn pool. Doesn’t anyone have anything better to do after school?

Was kind of disappointing to see that she actually meant that they would be literally cleaning the pool, however. That had porn scenario written all over it, especially with multiple boys and girls joining in. I had the bad ’80s music queued up and everything. Guess that shows what Mrs. Watanabe really thinks of them — they’re cleaning the pool so that she can dirty it up during her next tryst. At least she was paying them, though considering the innuendos this show has been throwing out, that could have meant anything. Double pay, you say? Ooh la la.

At least the battle is fairly fun, with a new twist being thrown in with the swords. (Pulled from the chest, of course. Is there any other way they could get them?) It would be kind of funny to see every battle adapt to the fighting style of the opponent. Tops on my wish list: A one-on-one game of basketball. Takuto could have the NBA Jam effect, except of course he would be all sparkly instead of on fire. You know you would want to see that.

Worst part of the episode: No booing/cheering audience! What the hell?! Was that a one-time gimmick?! Hopefully it’s just taking an episode or two off so that it stays fresh. The booing and cheering would probably get old after a while if the series were to overuse it, and they were cheering for lame shit like the Glittering Crux crew sentencing Takuto to two weeks of dishwashing duty for violating curfew.

But, yeah, on that note, the Glittering Crux meetings definitely need a little extra kick to them. As I mentioned in my previous post, one of my favorite small bits of Utena was how the student council would be doing mundane shit like playing cards and whatnot as they discussed bringing revolution to the world, breaking the world’s shell and so on. Just a bunch of bored teenagers discussing crazy ideas as if they truly could not care less about them. Always got a kick out of that.

Star Driver doesn’t need to deliberately ape Utena to that extent (even though it already has with a boatload of other things already :p), but just a bit more pizzaz so that every meeting doesn’t unfold the exact same way. The cheering/booing audience definitely brought that bit of difference in the previous episode. Maybe they should take some audience comments like it’s a bad daytime talk show or something. The audience is already just a few shouts short of a Jerry Springer crowd anyway. Might as well go all the way with it.

So, yeah, this episode is entertaining enough, but it definitely needs to start bringing the steak to match the sizzle to use a lame cliche.

8 Responses to “Star Driver 3 – The Hammer Is My Penis”

  1. I’m not sure if I’d want to watch a porno that included a crocodile =|

  2. Rather than the cheering and booing of the audience, wasn’t this week’s gimmick for the Glittering Crux meeting all about the leg crossing?

  3. Like Jo said this weeks gimmick is all about the leg crossing after each person speaks. If they speak twice they, cross twice etc.

    “A one-on-one game of basketball.”

    I believe there was a series that combined mecha and basketball. It was called Basquash and it wasn’t that good. (though I enjoyed it)
    It did have really great graphics though.

  4. “Porn scenario”, you say? I was also hoping for some “fun”. Maybe something with this to go along in the background:

    Hey, we have the bishies. We’ve got half the material already, don’t we?

  5. Mythical Gloss Says:

    well the only thing for sure right now is that they have almost ran out of guys, there’s only that pink haired dude left so they have to change it up.

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